Waiting to Close

I had to change the theme for this blog to darker colors because my eyes have been killing me lately. I did the same with my laptops, and now my eyes feel much better. So anyway, I got a little anxious last week Wednesday. I wanted to know what was going on with the mortgage process so I emailed Petey Tim’s assistant that night. She replied with this:

"You were cleared to close. You can contact the attorneys that your file was assigned to schedule your closing. If you have any other questions please let me know. Congratulations!”

Initially, I was happy. I’m cleared to close, so there should be no problem, right? Well, let’s see. I emailed my lawyer Marvin Wassle and asked if we can close next week. Here’s what he replied:

“Probably not early next week.  Still awaiting title from seller’s atty.  Will call him again today”

I was furious. After all the bullshit the seller’s attorney put me through by pressuring me to get the commitment letter with that deadline, and his stupid ass doesn’t even have the title yet?? I emailed my idiot real estate agent Prius about the situation, and she said that both she and the listing agent Condi will get on the seller’s attorney. The reason why I was so angry had to do with the May rents. If we end up closing after May 1st, then don’t I lose my entitlement to a little over $2000 in rents? After all, if I’m not the owner by May 1st, the seller can collect the rents, get his nice check for selling the house, and leave me in a month with a new property and no rents. That would piss me off. So I asked Marvin Wassle if it matters whether I close in after May 1st in relation to the rents.  He replied:

“I still don’t have the title. I called seller’s attorney and they are working on it. No matter when we close rents will be prorated for month in which we close.”

The hell does that mean? I hate terms like prorated because… well, I’m not a bright man. I know what prorated rent means in terms of tenants moving in, but how will that apply to closings? Haha, the nerve of my lawyer using real estate terms with a real estate investor! Seriously though, I like simple words and numbers. Like Jeremy Irons’ character in Margin Call, “Explain it to me as you would a child.” So I looked it up, and apparently the prorated rent will be a credit to the buyer (me) and a debit to the seller. This should mean that I pay less out of pocket at the closing. In other words, whatever the amount of collected rent there is will be subtracted from what I have to pay in total at closing. I think that’s what it means, and I’m okay with that. So now... I wait. And wait. And wait. While I wait, by the way, I'm becoming more self destructive. Last night, for example, I ate until I was full, the first time I did that all year. I'm not sleeping very well. The mortgage process is going faster than I thought (the second time around) which is very good, but the waiting is absolute torture.