Business and Ethics

It’s Saturday, 10:39pm. I’m at the shipping depot and I… hmm. I’m not sure how to write this post. You know, I… hmm. I really don’t know how to write this. I’ve stared at this stupid laptop screen for about a half hour now. I should just write this raw and then see what happens, right? Okay, here it goes:

So I was sitting back at the depot today, going through some movies on my laptop. I had waited a long time to re-watch two movies that I’ve always liked but hadn’t seen in a while—Anything Else and Sister Act. As I watched movies, something got in my head to start looking at mugshots online. I came upon a website that stores all the mugshots in the US and got curious. I wondered if they had mugshots of people who’ve been arrested in Smalltown. I clicked on New York, then clicked on Smalltown’s county, and they had hundreds of mugshots. I thought it’d be a fun little “thing to do” while I watched movies to see if I knew anyone who’d been arrested. On the very first page, I saw a face. At first I thought it was a former handyman that I hired and fired during my Craigslist days. Then I saw the name under it and realized who it was—Rory, the tenant of property Charlie. He kinda looks like a drunk so I figured it was for a DUI or disorderly conduct. I clicked on the picture and saw was he was charged with and convicted on:

Charges
Title: PL
Section: 130.30
Description: Attempted Rape- 2nd Degree
Conviction Date: June 16th, 1998
Victim: Female, 11 years old

My heart started beating fast. I mean, really fast. I’ve inherited a pedophile when I bought property Charlie. What do I do? See, if it were almost any other crime… if I were any other person… this wouldn’t be a situation where I’m at a complete loss. But I am who I am. I did a post a while back where I touched on the fact that I was molested when I was about 9. I didn’t really grasp what had happened until after puberty, but even then I didn’t think much of it. I knew something wrong had happened, but it didn’t seem like a big deal. As far as I was concerned, I got a blowjob before any of my friends. It wasn’t until my ego started to develop that I realized what had happened. It wasn’t the creepiness of the act or that sick feeling I got when I thought about it. It was the idea that someone took advantage of me and got away with it. I couldn’t live with the idea so I created a revenge list. I put all the names of the people that I wanted to get revenge on (there were only 2 at the time) and put it in my special hiding area—on one of the drop ceiling panels in my bedroom. He was at the top of that list. About 6 years ago, I delivered on a promise I made to myself that he’d pay for it and he did. I just needed to build up the money… obviously I can’t go into detail, but it was just. It felt right and was my way of dealing with the issue.

Knowing the kind of person I am, how in the hell am I gonna deal with this? At first I went online to see what attempted 2nd degree rape was, but I stopped myself because it doesn’t matter. Pedophiles are pedophiles. That’s it. I mean, can I really go to sleep at night knowing I house pedophiles in my units? I’m running a business. I’m providing a service to house people and they pay me for it. So, technically speaking, I’m doing business with a pedophile. Ugh, this post is really tough to write. I’m seething mad and trying to organize my thoughts at the same time. What the hell am I supposed to do here? For once, I really don’t have the answer to the question. Maybe I need to sleep on this or… I dunno.

I remember the first time I went to file Kylie Ray’s eviction in June, I saw Rory and Brie at the city marshal’s office. I pretended not to see them and Rory got up and faced away from me, hoping that I wouldn’t see him as I passed by. At first I thought it was that he was embarrassed about getting a speeding ticket or something, but now I’m almost positive that I he didn’t want me to get suspicious and look him up. And, if Brie was there with him, does that mean that she knows too? And what about property Charlie’s previous owner, Ronnie Mud? The conviction happened while Rory was living in his property, so he must’ve known too. Fucking animals, I swear. The only thing I know for sure is that… ugh, I’m getting a massive headache and I can’t write this anymore. Maybe a good night’s sleep will clear things up for me.

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It’s Sunday, 12:31pm. A good night’s sleep actually helped me clarify my options. My choices are to treat this as a personal matter or to treat this as a business matter. If personally, I throw him out immediately. If I treat this like a business situation, then Rory has “paid his debt to society” and has committed no recent crime that would prevent him from staying in my property and should stay. Fuck. I hate this. No, I really hate this. For almost 4 years I’ve prided myself on my ambition and my good business practices. I’ve leaned on them when I didn’t know what to do in a situation. Good business practices tell me not to take anything personal, no matter what. The most important thing is to be able to make decisions for the purposes of sustainable financial growth. By this logic, Rory would stay. I would be doing business with a convicted pedophile… in league with one of them. I would be aiding his existence. I… FUCK! I’ve had my ethics tested before but never like this. There was always a clear answer at the end. Fuck Rory for putting me in this situation. I hope that 11 year old grows up to be the next Rhonda Rousey and snaps his fucking neck.

I’ll think on this more. My choices have been presented and I have to really think this out. If I take the personal route, I’d be throwing out all the things I’ve taught myself in business and would be creating an opening for personal decisions in the future. For someone who models his life through patterns to sidestep his addictive personality, that would be a disaster. If I take the business route, I… I’d be facilitating the well being of a convicted pedophile. I’d be a monster-by-association. Thankfully, football is starting so I can take a break from all this shit right now (although I'm pretty sure I'm in for more bad news since I'm a Giants fan). I just… ugh. You know, there really are too many of the wrong type of people on this planet. I guess I’ll find out if I’m one of them.

P.S.: I just thought of something. What if he does it again? Would I be at fault? Do I have a responsibility to keep people like him out of the neighborhood I’ve invested in? Does it matter if he was already in the neighborhood decades before I bought property Charlie? This makes my decision harder. Fuck you very much, Rory.