It's -12 degrees. It's -12 degrees. No matter how many times I write that, it seems an inadequate representation for how cold it is in Smalltown. The water pipes in the batcave froze up so I couldn't take a shower, and now my dirty ass is walking a parking garage in -12 degrees. I really can't wait to retire and open up my first office. If I can expand to Hawaii or Florida before I'm 40 (or dead), I can be one of those NY landlords that spend the winter in tropical places and let the tenants deal with the cold.
Days like this I really hate. I wanna set the world on fire and put the fire out with a baseball bat. It’s when I can’t see anything but the bad stuff. I see the welfare people cozy in their beds sleeping while I walk the cold garage. I see the office people go into their nice warm offices as I walk the cold garage. I see all my tenants with nicely heated apartments that have walls and ceilings and bathrooms to take nice hot showers because their water pipes aren’t frozen. My hands are freezing. I only got 3 hours of sleep last night thanks to that shipping depot. Ola and Sha still work there. I ate a boat load of comfort food today—10 slices of French toast, two bagels with butter, a western omelet with toast, scrambled eggs and corned beef hash on an everything bagel, and one bagel with creamed cheese—and that really didn’t help my mood (as comfort foods never do). But by tonight, I should be okay.
By tonight I’ll remember that this cold front won’t last forever. By tonight I’ll remember that, by the end of 2015, I’ll be able to do everything the welfare people do, except I’ll be making much more money and I don’t have to ask for shit. By tonight I’ll remember just how annoying it is to go to work, no matter how good of a job one has. By tonight I’ll remember that my basement apartment will be done by the end of the year. By tonight I’ll remember that Ola and Sha are only temporary at the shipping depot. Ola has already begun applying for other jobs, and Sha is already screwing up by showing up late and not doing his job. By tonight I’ll realize that, while I messed up with food today, my regular eating habits are slowly returning. I conquered my Big Mac addiction a few days ago and can no longer stand the sight of that thing. By tonight I will have bought a heating gun to heat the frozen water pipes in the batcave, and will lie on my bed. I’ll realize that there are hundreds of millions of people in other countries that would gladly slit my throat to be in my position, to make enough money to support themselves and their families without having to hustle so much. By tonight it'll still be freezing cold, but it won't matter.
When I get home I’ll watch a few episodes of old TV shows, commit the act of masturbation, sleep the night away, and then wake up to do it all again tomorrow. My bad moods don’t last very long... even on days like this. I need to read a post like this for times when… I… um… hmm. I just checked the weather and it’s 66 degrees in Miami, and 73 in Hawaii. Hmm… my bad moods may not last very long, but that new information should extend it until I leave here at 7pm. But by tonight…
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