The Necessity of Hopelessness

I didn’t understand something. When Kirsten told me that my application for a mortgage was denied, I took it hard. Harder than I usually take things. It was as if she told me that someone stole all my money and I’ll have to start from scratch. So I wondered why I was so affected by the denial, and then I realized what the problem was—hope.

When Kirsten was going over my application, she made it seem as though everything was fine and there wouldn’t be a problem. Combine that with getting a second chance at the mortgage when I believed it couldn't happen, and my hopes were pretty high. I had forgotten that one of the principal elements in my business philosophy is to not get my hopes up about ANYTHING. Keep a level head and don’t celebrate until I sign on that dotted line and the property is officially mine. So I learned that lesson and applied it to my application with Empower. BJ Bank had a chance, but Barbie was taking far too long to get back to me. And she said that they couldn’t give me an approval letter yet because Bank of America and Chase are still reporting that I owed them money.

I went to both banks and asked what the problem is, since I paid the creditors through settlements in 2011. Apparently, when I settled both accounts, that was only to get the creditors off my back. I still owed the remaining balances and the banks were still reporting the accounts as delinquent. So I paid off both accounts and am now waiting for the “Paid in Full” letters. This was a valuable lesson: If I know I’m going to be applying for mortgages, make sure to pay all debts in full. No settlements. Settlements show a lender that I’m an irresponsible asshole who can’t pay back his debts fully, so why would they want to be my next victim? Empower, however, gave me an approval letter without needing the Paid in Full letter, so I had to go with them. I called Barbie and left a message saying that I was going with Empower but, if things don’t work out, then I hope to do business with her and BJ Bank in the future. I think that was the professional way to do it, and I needed to keep good relations with them. 

Petey Tim took my application on Friday and said that everything looked good. I wasn't concerned. I just said okay and went my way. I’m back to thinking like Roger Dodger, without all the learned behaviors of highs and lows. I’ve got to keep strengthening my real estate callus and my practical thought. It’s the only way I’ll be able to handle the lows of real estate without falling apart.