Yesterday I went to fill out applications for another security company, GBC, the same that Sha works for. The boss of GBC is Jerry Dyes. From this meeting, I realized that I have alot of work to do socially.
I went with Sha and got the application at GBC. Jerry had to run out to FedEx to mail something, so I couldn't stay and fill it out there. He could stay, however, to shoot the shit with Sha for almost 40 minutes. I stood there like an idiot as they talked, not saying a word. I just froze because I really had nothing to say. Sha and Jerry talked about real estate, vacations, company stuff, as if they were the best of friends. I even got some tips on where to invest next, just by listening to them yap.
What drove me crazy was that it was I that met Jerry first about a year ago, and introduced Sha to him, even filled out applications at the same time. But, for some reason, Sha got picked, I didn't, and Jerry and I didn't speak again. I felt stupid. How the hell am I going to make it in real estate if I can't even interject into a conversation ABOUT REAL ESTATE?! I kept trying to jump in but I simply couldn't. It didn't feel like my place to speak. It's a problem I've had since I was a kid, and I'm forced to address it now.
Sha has charisma, and through this he's able to make friends, get women and so on. Through his conversations with Jerry, he was able to find out that Jerry was also in real estate, and was invited to vacation with Jerry at one of his Florida properties. He gets favoritism over any of the other guards and they talk as if they were the best of friends. This sounds as if I'm in someway jealous, but I'm not. I no longer have the parts to be jealous. What I am, however, is a realist.
I can no longer avoid conversation with people. I always despised banter, but it looks like I have no choice. Conversation in the real estate business can lead to useful information, and useful information in ANY business can lead to great success if used properly. So I've started a project on my personal blog already. It's designed to create an arsenal of dialogue that gives me what I want in a conversation, while giving the illusion that I'm giving the audience what they want as well.
The first objective is to identify who the subject is. The second is to identify what I want from them. The third is to identify what they want from me. After that, it's all about execution. I'm setting it up on my personal blog and I'm starting alot of experiments. It'll put me in alot of uncomfortable situations, but it's gotta be done. I don't fool myself into thinking that this will be a quick fix. It will take months of dedicated research, time, and perhaps even money to get a system down. I don't have a strong charisma like Sha does, nor do I want one like his. I want to be able to get what I want without compromising what I consider as "myself". I'll be able to do it though, and being a sociopath may help.
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